Some years back I was at a family celebration and visiting with another friend of the family. She is a lovely, educated woman, attractive and well dressed. But she was wearing shoes that can best be described as utilitarian. She commented about her footwear. She said, "you know, after a woman turns fifty five, no one looks at her feet." Now that's a pretty freeing statement on its own.
More and more it seems to me that after sixty five, or maybe seventy, no one looks at one much at all. And conversely, I know I do a very poor job of setting names and faces in my memory. Only this morning a cute young mom with a couple of Kyndall-sized kids greeted me as the end of the church service. I said, "I know I've met you , please tell me when and where." Turns out it was the wild Chuckee Cheese birthday party a few weeks ago. At that party she had asked me if I was at Christ Church because I looked familiar.
Now I have a new identity and its working really well for me. If you have kids you may remember back to the elementary school days when they had friends over to play. When things got out of hand, or not, a visiting child would come running to you saying, "Laura's Mommy, so and so pushed me." Or maybe, "Stephen's mother, do you have a bandaid?"
Guess who I am now. I am Kathy Bosley's mother! Her range of acquaintances is huge, from early days of teaching here, to years of church work and now she and her children's involvement at All Saints (never mind that years ago she worked at Chili's and made a lot of friends there too). Its a great introduction and so many people connect immediately. The first Sunday I introduced myself to Fr. Brandon (Chaplain at All Saints and on the staff at Christ Church) I followed that with "you do know Kathy Bosley, don't you." He replied, "doesn't everyone know Kathy Bosley?"
What a gift it is not to have to explain oneself. Better still what a great connection it is. Today after introducing myself to a man for whose family she helped in many capacities for many years, he studied me a bit and then said, "I see her in you." Wow.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Not every holiday memory ....
is filled with joyfulness.
My Father died on Super Bowl Sunday, 1977. In order to find out what date that actually was ...January 9th, I always Google "Super Bowl Winners". He was in the hospital in Lordsburg, NM, and we were in Alief. We had been there to tell him goodbye at Christmas time. He had always wanted to go up in the mountains and die under a tree like the Indians (Native Americans) did. He could see a couple small ranges of mountains out his hospital room window. He was 71 years old and had been in failing health for several years.
Fast forward to another holiday, Thanksgiving two years ago. That was the day I got home from New Braunfels to find an e-mail from "the man of my dreams" telling me he had found the woman of his and I was out of the picture. Not a huge deal since he indicated at the beginning of an almost three year "relationship" that he was still grieving a dead wife and not ready for a romance. However, after three years you sort of hope things are coming around. They were not.
My mistake. I had wished for a "romance" since I was aging quickly and had been alone for a very long time. I don't know why not one of my family or friends ever "fixed me up" with anyone, not uncles visiting from another state, not some friend's ex-husband, no one. Perhaps there were good reasons. Anyway, when this particular fella called and asked if I would like to go to dinner, since he was going to be up Grimes County way on something important, I dropped the phone and hollered with glee. (It was a recording)
I won't bore you with the events that led up to this or with how I'd known him for about 40 years, him and his wife and children.
The facts are, not all holiday memories are just swell. Super Bowls are no long played in early January, so that doesn't bring immediate memories of my Dad's passing. However, every year at this time it is Thanksgiving and so I have an exact count of how many years ago my heart was broken (it was broken). Today its two years. I'm doing well, thanks for asking. Still think about him. Still conjure up pretend scenarios where he shows up, calls up .... or even, e-mails me to say he's sorry. I guess he's not sorry.
And thankfully, as the years pass, I realize that is probably just as well. We wouldn't have agreed about the election. Tyler is much farther away than Navasota. And I am a grateful and confirmed "loner."
So, to heck with memories, have a swell holiday filled with pleasant memories.
My Father died on Super Bowl Sunday, 1977. In order to find out what date that actually was ...January 9th, I always Google "Super Bowl Winners". He was in the hospital in Lordsburg, NM, and we were in Alief. We had been there to tell him goodbye at Christmas time. He had always wanted to go up in the mountains and die under a tree like the Indians (Native Americans) did. He could see a couple small ranges of mountains out his hospital room window. He was 71 years old and had been in failing health for several years.
Fast forward to another holiday, Thanksgiving two years ago. That was the day I got home from New Braunfels to find an e-mail from "the man of my dreams" telling me he had found the woman of his and I was out of the picture. Not a huge deal since he indicated at the beginning of an almost three year "relationship" that he was still grieving a dead wife and not ready for a romance. However, after three years you sort of hope things are coming around. They were not.
My mistake. I had wished for a "romance" since I was aging quickly and had been alone for a very long time. I don't know why not one of my family or friends ever "fixed me up" with anyone, not uncles visiting from another state, not some friend's ex-husband, no one. Perhaps there were good reasons. Anyway, when this particular fella called and asked if I would like to go to dinner, since he was going to be up Grimes County way on something important, I dropped the phone and hollered with glee. (It was a recording)
I won't bore you with the events that led up to this or with how I'd known him for about 40 years, him and his wife and children.
The facts are, not all holiday memories are just swell. Super Bowls are no long played in early January, so that doesn't bring immediate memories of my Dad's passing. However, every year at this time it is Thanksgiving and so I have an exact count of how many years ago my heart was broken (it was broken). Today its two years. I'm doing well, thanks for asking. Still think about him. Still conjure up pretend scenarios where he shows up, calls up .... or even, e-mails me to say he's sorry. I guess he's not sorry.
And thankfully, as the years pass, I realize that is probably just as well. We wouldn't have agreed about the election. Tyler is much farther away than Navasota. And I am a grateful and confirmed "loner."
So, to heck with memories, have a swell holiday filled with pleasant memories.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Hi Ho Hi Ho .... its off to work THEY go.
This Fall has brought a bustle of new employment and opportunities to our family. I think it is just lovely that so many of us have found new ways to stay busy and earn money. I am equally thrilled that I am not really one of them.
Youngest child, Kathy and Lane have opened their new store, Clothes Mentor, in a very posh area of Tyler and it seems to be going very well. Since they are also hard at work at their day jobs, I pitch in with cooking and kid transport.
Oldest child, Laura, is taking on a new position at Randolph Brooks CU, where she has been a valued customer for a very long time. We hope it will leave her time to stay at all the gorgeous quilts and crafts that make her so happy.
Other daughter (in-law) Laura is criss crossing the South in her job with Convention South ... a job I think I would have loved to have.
Granddaughter Katelyn is happy to be back in Baton Rouge and working near LSU while she ponders her next step in education. She's also helping out a cheer buddy a couple days a week in New Iberia. (Who wouldn't want to be in New Iberia? The place just smells wonderful.)
GD Alexis is in the cheer business too, as a member of the Blazers cheer squad while she studies at UAB.
Then there are the grandsons. Matt has moved to Chattanooga, TN, and says I should come visit ... that I would like it.
Tom found this cool job, working for art galleries aboard cruise ships. Between trips he visited cousin Curtis, told him about it, and now Curtis is in training for the same career. Let me see, they get paid to live on cruise ships and tour the world. That's another one I could have loved.
Currie is hard at work at two busy construction sites on Houston's east side and comes to visit his house (and his Mother) here in Whitehouse when he can get away.
Three months without a real job ... that would be me and I am not complaining. I'm also not shopping and not planning any big Christmas gifts to anybody but there's a lot to be said for the idle life. That's a joke, I'm not really idle but I don't really have a "boss" either.
Hi Ho Hi Ho, its off to Gentle Yoga I go.
This Fall has brought a bustle of new employment and opportunities to our family. I think it is just lovely that so many of us have found new ways to stay busy and earn money. I am equally thrilled that I am not really one of them.
Youngest child, Kathy and Lane have opened their new store, Clothes Mentor, in a very posh area of Tyler and it seems to be going very well. Since they are also hard at work at their day jobs, I pitch in with cooking and kid transport.
Oldest child, Laura, is taking on a new position at Randolph Brooks CU, where she has been a valued customer for a very long time. We hope it will leave her time to stay at all the gorgeous quilts and crafts that make her so happy.
Other daughter (in-law) Laura is criss crossing the South in her job with Convention South ... a job I think I would have loved to have.
Granddaughter Katelyn is happy to be back in Baton Rouge and working near LSU while she ponders her next step in education. She's also helping out a cheer buddy a couple days a week in New Iberia. (Who wouldn't want to be in New Iberia? The place just smells wonderful.)
GD Alexis is in the cheer business too, as a member of the Blazers cheer squad while she studies at UAB.
Then there are the grandsons. Matt has moved to Chattanooga, TN, and says I should come visit ... that I would like it.
Tom found this cool job, working for art galleries aboard cruise ships. Between trips he visited cousin Curtis, told him about it, and now Curtis is in training for the same career. Let me see, they get paid to live on cruise ships and tour the world. That's another one I could have loved.
Currie is hard at work at two busy construction sites on Houston's east side and comes to visit his house (and his Mother) here in Whitehouse when he can get away.
Three months without a real job ... that would be me and I am not complaining. I'm also not shopping and not planning any big Christmas gifts to anybody but there's a lot to be said for the idle life. That's a joke, I'm not really idle but I don't really have a "boss" either.
Hi Ho Hi Ho, its off to Gentle Yoga I go.
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